Complaining only brings problems

Published 10:23 pm Tuesday, September 20, 2011

My dear sweet mother has passed on, but her advice still impacts my life. I vividly recall one piece of advice. She said it so graphically and profoundly I never forgot it.

More importantly, I try to live one aspect of my life by the principle imbued in that advice.

Before I share the advice, I want to tell you the problem. As a child, I was a constant complainer. I complained about everybody and everything. I even complained about myself.

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One day I was complaining about something and my mother said, “Come here, son.” I came and she said, “Son, I want you to understand that complaining does exactly two things.

First, it makes your friends avoid you. No matter how much your friends love you, they don’t want to hear you complaining all the time. Son, the second thing about complaining is it puts your business in the streets. By the time it circulates and comes back to you, you can’t even recognize what you said because it has changed so much. So don’t complain!”

I began to watch myself and others. I saw the truth in what she said. There are those I truly love but sometimes I hate to see them coming because I know they are going to complain about something. If I could, I would escape them.

I ask you, “Are there people you really care about but you hate to see coming because they will invariably complain about something?” Do you want to escape them? Think about it.

My mother’s advice was so graphic and profound, I began trying to complain less. It was not easy for complaining was an intrinsic part of my personality. I really worked hard to change.

There is another thing my mother told me that ties into the advice I just shared. It was not said on the same occasion but it certainly connects. She said, “Son, no one is perfect. I am not perfect. You are not perfect. We have to accept people as they are.” I realized that a lot of what I was complaining about was just human nature (imperfections), not something wrong and

I am so glad my mother did not accept me as I was. She placed a few well chosen words on my heart and made a profound difference in my whole life. I am glad to pass that advice on