The Selma Times-Journal

Lakers vs. Celtics.

If this isn’t the NBA Finals you wanted, you had better not tell me because I won’t talk to you for a week.

For someone who is extremely anti-NBA, this is one of the few things that could swing me back to full-fledged fandom.

Probably the only other thing would be transplanting Michael Jordan’s knees with space-age titanium replacements, putting him in a Clippers uniform and watching him lead one of the worst teams in the league to a title. Hope there’s a super genius Swedish doctor reading this.

So then I got to thinking …

What is it going to take to make this championship as good as advertised? I’ve got my own ideas, and I’ll talk about them when we go down “The List.”

7. A Game 7 – Pretty much none of the players want to hear that because they’re tired, and they want to get some quality time in their summer homes. But I pay good money to watch them, and I … Well, I don’t pay good money or any money, really. But a lot of people do. And they want to be entertained to the fullest extent possible!

6. An injury comeback – Just imagine if Kobe Bryant got his appendix removed or if Ray Allen broke a bone in his face because of a freak cookie jar accident at his house before the deciding game. Scoring 50 points after that would be pretty special.

5. A touching human interest story – Picture it … A girl dying of scurvy looking up into her hero’s eyes and telling him hitting the game-winning shot is the only thing that can save her. Too bad the girl is also blind and doesn’t realize her hero is the 12th man and hasn’t played since April.

4. A halftime brawl – Between the mascots and, get this … the opposing cheerleaders. Yeah, man! You can’t pay for TV that good.

3. Halftime dunk contest – Between Charles Barkley and ESPN’s Stewart Scott … Thinking … thinking … Next week on “The List,” I’ll count down how many types of weird that would be.

2. Full-contact overtimes – Oh wait, they already allow that. Just ask Brent Barry.

1. Prediction – I almost forgot to tell you my pick to win the series. Lakers in 7. Kobe is as close to Jordan as we’re gonna get.

George L. Jones is the Times-Journal managing editor and may be reached at 334-410-1744 or george.jones@selmatimesjournal.com.